Which Wolf Wins? Always, the One You Feed

Yeah, we all sometimes feel the need to push back when someone gets us all riled up. But have you ever noticed that some people actually seem to want, or simply NEED to blow their stack from time to time? In fact, many pent up, deeply frustrated people tend to save up all their stress and anxieties, until they find someone or something they think they can safely and justifiably dump their inner fury onto. Which isn't really healthy when you really think about it. For ourselves or the people around us.

Yes, people shouldn't push us to our limits, but we all have a responsibility to let the people around us know when enough is enough. It's just a matter of knowing how to establish boundaries for oneself, and learning how to keep the all too predatory wolf in others at bay. And let's face it, mankind is still a more and/or less predatory animal in most respects.

All of this becomes even more apparent when living long term in any one of several Northeast Asian countries (as I most definitely have), where people are expected to keep their emotions in check (or simply under cover) all the time. So it's not that people in the Far East are all somehow genetically endowed with the godlike power to be the walking, talking epitome of wise old Mr. Miyagi (from The Karate Kid). 'Cause wouldn't the very notion technically be "racist?" So it's rather that the strictures of Asian CULTure simply will not allow the vast majority of people within their highly structured societies to express even the simplest, and often most beneficial of human emotions.

Seriously! Living with and among people who fancy themselves "stoic" in more (and often considerably less) modern Asia is actually a lot like living on the planet Vulcan, of Star Trek fame. You know, like how, Mr. Spock famously never loses his highfalutin cool and venerable Vulcan logic. Except when he actually finally does, that is. And when he does lose it, he tends to lose it in a very big way. And believe it or not, so do people from typically pent up societies right here on Earth, in places where just about any healthy, straightforward and HONEST public display of emotion is frowned upon.

Well, you see, kids, this all started a long, long time ago, during a Chinese Dynasty (the Zhou, to be exact) far, far away, where there lived this dude named 孔夫子 (otherwise known as Confucius). And boy, was "Master Kong" awfully, awfully concerned about people being able to control (or simply appear to control) their social interactions with one another.

In fact, old Confucius was apparently so interested in controlling people, that his teachings are nowadays still very much the basic blueprint for what is and isn't acceptable social behavior in places like China, Taiwan (the Republic of China), Korea, and Japan. Heck! Even some highly Americanized Filipinos I've known over the years often seemed to have major problems with the display of any public emotion that isn't "happy." Or faux happy at the very least.

"No, you are happy!" a presumably well meaning (but overbearingly so) elder Filipino co-worker once kept repeating to me, over and over, and OVER AGAIN, when I was having a particularly tough and gloomy day. Now mind you, I wasn't killing anybody that particular day. I wasn't burning down buildings and skewering innocent babies, or anything clearly hideous like that either.

NO! I just didn't look FAKE HAPPY while minding my own damn business, doing my job to the usual best of my humble ability. And in my own country (where many people simply don't feel obliged to be phony), no less. I just simply wasn't all that happy that day. But I don't even really remember why now, so it couldn't have been that bad, now could it? But I sure do remember how overbearing this old guy got with me about MY bad day!

'Cause believe me, being forced to look "happy" (by a guy who wasn't even my boss) can be awfully overbearing when it just doesn't seem like a truly genuine thing to do. And even if this old dude was honestly trying to cheer me up, where did HE get off telling ME how I should FEEL? Was the bossy old fart in MY shoes? No. I think NOT.

But I try to like everybody everywhere as often as I can, of course, so let's not target, or get too fussy about any one group of people, shall we? Live and let live, I always say! Well, not always, but I'm sure there's somebody or other who honestly thinks they always, always, always believe all that fancy stuff. You know, like... oh... politicians, and all the people with those lengthy lists of "friends" on social media sites like Facebook. Those people. The perfect ones. The ones who never make mistakes. They never get angry. Well, sometimes, they certainly do have to throw their thunderbolts down from mighty Mount Olympus, do they not?

Unless... they never experience cyberbullying, or have to deal with angry little Internet trolls. Actually, they do have to deal with people like that (on and off the Internet), of course. We all do, in the Real World. But let's get back to the real point, shall we? Which is: A certain percentage of people from every walk of life, in every country, of every so-called "race," color, creed, you name it, are simply TWO FACED. There are of course various reasons for this, but it's still a fact, nonetheless. Yeah.  Sucks, too.  But that's the way a whole lot of our fellow human beans are, you know. Heck, I've even had a few Japanese friends who jokingly told me, "Some of us are even three faced!" Well... at least I hope they were joking....

But then, the art of cultivating effective social interactions and good, healthy methods of self expression isn't something that is necessarily taught anywhere, is it? So being sociable anywhere in the world can be pretty tough (no matter what Confucius supposedly said). Especially on the Internet, where we often can't even really see or know exactly who it is that we're actually interacting with. Which can actually be kind of scary, if you really stop and think about it.

But some people really do seem to need to "bait and switch." They love to play the victim, who can suddenly become the righteously indignant reverse-aggressor (consciously or not). In fact, this can be highly rewarding for many people who don't really know either how to express themselves in an honest, open, and healthy way, or they simply would rather not have to. But here's the thing; being aware of one's own personal limits and effectively communicating what is and isn't acceptable for everyone involved is everyone's responsibility. No exceptions!

True, it usually takes time to sort these things out with people we come in contact with throughout the course of our lives. The worst part is that many people simply don't show others their true selves. So if someone you know seems to be too good (or too bad) to be true, they probably really are. Many of these people tend to ooze a kind of "social honey," hoping to catch as many unsuspecting flies as possible, only to show you a dramatically less appealing, and much less outwardly amiable personality than what you originally thought you were getting -- especially when the chips are down, or when they think nobody is looking.

One way or another, learning to set your own boundaries, and becoming sensitive enough to be aware of the limitations of others is often a gradual and sometimes quite hard won process. Worst of all, there really aren't any instruction booklets (though I suppose one can spend a fortune on "self help" books), so learning to recognize which kind of individuals are more apt to push your buttons, and thereby push you to your limits, is often a lifelong process.

In the final analysis, remember that you and you alone are responsible for your own actions. After a major blow up, you can always say that the devil made you do it, but unless you are full of the same kind of conceit and self denial that helps most truly deceptive people to remain hidden behind various social behaviors that mask their true nature, you will already be able to readily recognize that you're not perfect either. None of us are.

In other words, there's a bit of the Devil in all of us! And it's usually buried right down there alongside the GOoD, where it fights for eventual, ultimate supremacy. So some of us are just more open and honest about who we really are than others. And if you cannot admit that to yourself and to the people closest to you, then you may actually be the one who has the most to learn (about yourself and others). But then, knowing how much or how little of the "bad" or the "good guy" that lies deep down in all of us, just waiting to rise up from the depths of Self Righteous Heaven or Hell, is the real trick, isn't it?

20090106 - Me, Angry?

Ode to the Ego Almighty

Of course, pay heed to those who appear to be benevolent, and who may genuinely seek to better the lives of all our fellow man. But follow any would-be messiah blindly at your own risk. Because even though some people seeking celebrity (money, face/fame, and power) actually really do mean well, there are plenty of others that think life's just all about what they can grab for themselves before it's finally all said and done with.

Those most needy of folks among us may even be chiefly motivated by the fact that life really is much too short. So by gaining celebrity, they are actually making a desperate bid for some sort of immortality -- before their own corporeal bones eventually also crumble to dust. And who doesn't want to be remembered when we all have finally returned to the mire from whence we came?  And yes, it really is just that simple. If you really think about it, that is.

Many misguided folks honestly think that by gaining great power, they can solve all their own problems (first and foremost, OF COURSE), and then, maybe, just maybe, they'll help out a few of their little "followers" further down on the list. Charity! You know, throw a crumb or two at those useful little minions who had the good sense to fuel your fire while you rocketed to THE TOP!

But even that doesn't always work out the way they planned, unfortunately. So many of those poor, dumb minions just end up serving as stepping stones, and pathetic footstools. Oh well! They served "the cause," after all. They paid the price of admission to THE BIG SHOW. They helped to fertilize the soil the rose was eventually planted in. And that's all that was really needed, of course.

In the end, most vainglorious people just end up with a real, real BIG head. Worst of all, once they get the gold they crave, they tend to quickly lose sight of what their noble quest was originally supposed to be all about in the first place! Such is the true folly of the flawed creation that is mankind.

Yes, some use politics. Some use religion. Some use anti-religion (popularly known as atheism), SCIENCE, "race," sex, sexual orientation, etc, etc, etc. The list goes on and on, and probably will continue to go on for as long as there are small people who just want nothing more than to get even just a little bit BIGGER than they actually, really, honestly are.

One way or another, you name it, and somebody will try to latch onto it and USE it, to get what they want out of other people, who don't always even know what hit 'em, while their little head spins in awe of those that they may be led to believe are bigger than they actually are.  That's how the magic really works, kids. "Cross me heart and hope to die." But don't worry, I won't stick a finger in your eye. But do beware; for there are plenty of BIG HEADS out there that certainly will try to use little old you to serve their own BIG ends.

But surely, you already knew all that.

On the Nature of New Age "Star" Religions and Other Forms of Consumer Driven, Pop Culture Mythology

Graven images from the Star Wars Universe! Oh my!

Contrary to popular, "modern," Western (and communist Chinese and Russian) belief (the latest pseudo-bright CULTural idea to come down the societal pike), religion in and of itself has NOT been solely "responsible for all the world's wars down through history." That's actually a socialist, Marxist idea, that, when put into proper perspective, is actually kinda stupid (simple minded, at the very least) when you think about it. Because mankind does not need religion to split up into warring factions, or to discriminate on the basis of "race," or anything else for that matter.

Nor is it always about "oil" or natural resources. On the contrary, there are all sorts of reasons why, in the real world, people come into conflict with one another. Usually, it's not just one reason, but a whole slew of reasons! Sometimes, people have simply fought over who should be "the rightful heir to the throne." No "blood for oil" or "my religion is best" required. Just good old/bad old human conflict. Like in the Star Wars Universe!

In fact, there has been war and conflict in the Far East many times throughout human history, without the significant presence of any of the Abrahamic faiths -- Judaism, Christianity, OR Islam -- ALL of which are part of the same family, let us not forget. Hell! There was war on the North American, South American, and Australian continents (and even among the tiny islands of the rest of Oceania) before the "evil" whites got to any of those places.

Duh.

Take away, or "ban" any human societal construct (society, device, etc), and there will still be some sort of internecine strife of one form or another. People will still jockey for power, face (fame), and Money Almighty. And to that end perhaps, 20th and 21st century science fiction and fantasy "creators" ("modern" mass media wizards and magicians) have been busy for quite some time now, conjuring up tons of all powerful mythologies (would be religions) to woo the masses into following their pseudo-godlike lead.

Not to even mention Tolkien (though I suppose I just did), in just this past century alone, we have seen the likes of the "Great Bird of the Galaxy" himself; as Gene Roddenberry, creator of Star Trek, became known. Even well before he passed away on October 24, 1991, the man had become a sort of messianic, modern, secular Moses type, ever leading the scientific faithful into a bold, ever "optimistic" future, where mankind has supposedly finally solved all sorts of social problems.

Of course, it's hard to say for absolute sure if the devoted following the very name Roddenberry still engenders to this very day among millions of devoted Star Trek fans truly went to the man's head, but all the fan boy adoration might just have helped to make him more and more intractable about particulars in the Star Trek Universe "Bible" as the Trek fan phenomenon grew and grew in popularity over the years. This was particularly evident while "the Great Bird" was reportedly lording over the writing staff of the Star Trek: The Next Generation TV series.

And what about that great conjurer of Disney movies, and the multi-billion dollar theme parks and mountains of accompanying merchandise that dear old Walt helped to pioneer? All of that still enthralls the faithful among us, does it not? And that other guy who came later on.... What's his name? The one who has inspired so many creative people to help him tell so many tales about that galaxy far, far away. Yes, the still very much mortal, George Lucas. That guy. When he eventually becomes a "Force Ghost," I am soooo gonna hang out with that spectral dude! Oh yes!

And, perhaps most interesting of all, that L. Ron Hubbard guy, the science fiction author of "Scientology" that, even though he may have thought he was rejecting old world mysticism, still managed to end up playing pretty much the same old god game when it was all said and done. Nah! Scientology is everything numero uno Scientologist Tom Cruise seems to sincerely believe it is, right? Well, right...?

Hmm.

Even Glen A. Larson's Battlestar Galactica (the original AND the 2004 version) had more than an ungodly share of "star" religious content, after all. As many folks know, Mr. Larson was a Mormon. And there's plenty of good old American mythology where that came from, eh? But the original series was a helluva lot of fun for yours truly when I was a kid. Heck! I still love that show an awful lot. Though often accused of being a rip off artist, Glen Larson was a genius, as far as I'm concerned. Or... a prophet maybe! Uh... no. NO. Scratch that. Uh, no.

Either way, the religious overtones of the original Battlestar Galactica series never bothered me a bit. It's the good old fashioned Power of Myth, people! In fact, I have always thought that it actually made the series much more powerful than it would have been without all the "religious mumbo jumbo." Sort of like the Force of Star Wars, I guess! 'Cause, come on, without that aspect of the Star Wars saga, all you're really left with is "good guys" and "bad guys" beating the tar out of one another all the time. Like in professional wrestling. And seriously, if that kind of mindless squabbling really floats your boat, just get involved in politics already, will ya. Bleh!

Even "re-imagined" show runners Ronald D. Moore and David Eick got all religious on us poor fan boys and girls!

So... THINK. Think it all through, all you smartypants of the collective human race! If you really are as smart as you fancy your fancy (geeky) pants, you'll plainly see that this equation really ain't that hard to solve. And think for your own damn self while you're at it, huh? But then, it is a prerequisite of many religions (though perhaps not all), that one must follow blindly. Hmm.

A staggering number of people in the UK and other countries have actually begun to identify "Jedi" as their religion

So, to me, this is all actually rather interesting. And funny. Funny "ha ha" sort of amusing, AND funny "strange," too. For example, many people who LOVE Star Wars, and couldn't live without seeing the latest movie, or collecting all the latest licensed merchandise based on the franchise, still, for some odd reason, HATE, HATE, HATE its creator, George Lucas. Hmm. Do we even know WHY that is, we star lost and star struck fan boys and girls?

What if.... What if, it's simply because George Lucas is so incredibly clever (or chock full of dumb luck?), that he actually managed to create something so powerful, so mythic, so timelessly EPIC, and of such towering social and commercial proportions, that he will have our geeky little panties in a bunch over it for the rest of our natural born lives? What then?

Hmm.

And many of us probably don't even fully understand how or why good old Mr. Lucas managed to pull such a colossal fast one on us like that! Well, speaking for myself, I personally still like and respect "Uncle George" -- though I certainly am no worshiper of that particular mortal man by any means. But anyway, if you do hate poor old King George, don't be too hard on him or yourself. You're "a consumer," after all. We all are, aren't we? So... consume! Better yet, continue to be consumed by all things Star Wars. Disney (the HUGE company, not necessarily the Force Ghost of Uncle Walt) will certainly be quite happy if you do.

Me? I'm not taking the red or the blue pill (or necessarily choosing the red or the blue light saber), thank you very much. For me, it's no batteries (or drugs - as in, Marx's mental opiates) required, kids. But, may the Force be with us all this holiday season. And as Charles Dickens and his wonderfully timeless literary creation Tiny Tim so aptly put it, "God bless us everyone." And make sure you go and see The Force Awakens now! Or you'll surely be nothing but an old "humbug." Or a Star Wars Universe heretic at the very least.

The Bigger You Get, the Harder You Fall

You know how some (not all) naughty cops allegedly create those "speed traps," where they set up a situation wherein the vast majority of people who enter the area being monitored are almost certainly bound to break the law, just because of the way things are set up?  You know, like how this law enforcement type person then just hides and waits for a perpetrator to come along, so they can conveniently catch, badger, and then write "the bad guys" a ticket?  Well, even when they don't actually write a ticket, they can still get a psychological thrill from self righteously standing in judgement of others.

That's the game.  That's how it works.  'Cause you know, most bullies are just little people deep inside, who were bullied when they were kids.

Now, personally, I'd never want to be a power junkie like that myself.  But I'll just bet that there really is no feeling, no drug, no high on Earth, like having so darned much POWER, that you automatically assume that everybody else is a potential miscreant, while you alone are "one of the good guys."

Interestingly enough, some people don't even use "the law" to be "at large and in charge."  Some use politics.  Some use sex or sexual orientation.  Some use race, ethnicity, or nationality.  Some use religion, of course.  But don't kid yourself.  There are also plenty of "atheists" who use their lack of faith as an excuse to bully, belittle and look down upon anyone who isn't as "skeptical" as they are.

What can ya say?  People!

So, I think plenty of people who aren't cops are natural born control freaks too.  In fact, I think the human social landscape is chock full of people who actually feed on their fellow man!  You know, real "dog eat dog" type stuff.  For example, there are those bossy type people we all know, who always have to be at large and in charge.  The sick high these individuals get from being offended by something someone else has supposedly said or done (no matter how innocent that perceived offense may or may not have been), is all that really matters to them.  That self righteous power fix, that mental opiate... is exactly what some sick people really do seem to crave and practically live for.

And believe me, I know, because I've known quite a few people like that.  Unfortunately.

At any rate, an excellent term for individuals who fit the above profile is, "psychic vampire."  Interestingly enough, many of these type of folks don't even realize what they're doing on a conscious level.  The fact that they tend to get their jollies by sucking the air out of everyone in every room they walk into, is a moot point to them.  In fact, these folks are often just plain oblivious to the needs and feelings of just about everyone else around them.  Because their needs and wants are all that matter, you see.  In short, that type of person is little more than a psychological predator.

And just about everybody knows somebody like that, don't they?  Somebody that, if they aren't the center of attention, and they're not calling the shots, they simply aren't going to be real happy for long.  Not until they've got something... anything to be pissed off about, that is.  After all, there must be someone to blame!  Offense is power, you see.  Being offended is actually as equally empowering as deliberately going out and giving offense.  But only for especially sick people, of course.

So, what's the moral of this story?  "Stay away from negative people," I guess.  And whenever possible, I most certainly do.

No Judgement?

Yes, sure, I'm a teetotaler myself, but don't worry, because come to think of it, some of the finest people I know are probably something pretty darn close to closet alcoholics.

But I don't "judge" people who drink a little every now and then, of course. Especially given the highly peer pressure oriented aspect of that particular liquid drug (that effectively gets most kids hooked at a pretty young age -- before they're even old enough to think for themselves, in most cases).

 

However... that does not mean that I feel the need to participate, or am even mildly apt to be susceptible to the massive social pressure that has long encouraged literally billions to join in that most ancient of human social customs.

In other words, to each his own, but don't expect me to join in all "the fun." Sure, I occasionally get a prescription for severe headaches (migraines, or something very much like them), that have plagued me periodically throughout the course of my life, whether I like it or not.

So why then, would I want to participate in a bizarre social custom that often includes becoming so pathetically intoxicated that one is required to puke up their own stomach contents, and then wake up with a massive headache the next morning?

Yep. You see, that part of all the "fun" of alcohol intoxication, right there, just continues to totally mystify me, I'm afraid. Yep. Uh-huh.

The More You Know

The more you know, the more you genuinely realize how much of all the rest of what's out there that you really don't know. And that's the way it should be. Because the day that you decide that you know it all, is the day you stop learning. And that's the day you really do get dumb.

Silence Truly is Golden

Never miss a chance to be quiet. Sometimes silence makes the sweetest music of all.