Don't let that title fool ya! Because yes, although some people may indeed treat their pets much better than they do their closest friends, it's also sadly true that far too many people the world over are cruel to animals.
But that's not what I'm about here. Because in fact, I do understand "pet people." I really do. Why, I myself have often kept fish (guppies) over the years, and no matter how small, fragile and typically short-lived this particular species of ornamental fish may in fact be, I always feel a pang of deep sorrow when even one of them dies. Heck! I even say a little prayer when I have to flush a dead guppy down the toilet.
Even better yet, I also sometimes dig a spoonful out of the soil of a potted plant and really give them a proper burial. Yeah, sentimental, I know, but you should see how well plants grow when fertilized that way. So yeah, I get it. I get "pet people," or rather, people who have an especially strong attachment to their little four legged friends. Or their little partners that may even slither, crawl, or swim. I get it. I really do.
But you really have to admit that structuring one's entire life around a specific breed (or breeds) of domesticated animals quite often (not always, but quite often) involves a whole lot of really counter-intuitive, counter-human behaviors, personal compromises and even sometimes rather bizarre habitat adaptations, that... sorry (not sorry) not everyone who visits your home is going to automatically understand or even be properly adapted to.
Yes, you get used to the smell. Yes, the dog doesn't growl, bark at, or try to bite you, but... it doesn't mean that you are not, in fact, co-habituating with what is still, like it or not, an animal. An animal that simply knows on an instinctive (or highly trained) level what it must and must not do to keep riding the gravy train of your worshipful doting personal care and attention.
So, sure, I get it. But is it your pet, or is it your slave? Hell! Who really is the master and who is the slave in some situations, right? Besides, it's probably just your best friend. 'Cause some animals really are "man's best friend," you know. Some animals even end up being surrogate "babies" for childless (or post-child rearing) couples. Some pets even serve as surrogate spouses! And what's wrong with that, right?
After all, there are many antidotes for loneliness, and pets, quite often, really can, and really do, fill that sweet spot in many a person's otherwise empty life. And I'm definitely for all that. I really am. Such as guide dogs, dogs leading the blind, dogs sniffing out bombs, etc., etc., etc. And hey! Where would good old Charlie Brown be without his Snoopy?
So yeah, I get it. I really, really do. I probably get it more than even a lot of pet owners do. Or rather, I may actually get it even more, honestly, than some folks may think they do. If, that is, they've actually ever even really bothered to think about it all that much to begin with. 'Cause a lot people really don't think all that much about a whole lot of things, you know.
Let's put it this way; if you're one of those people who keeps what, basically, was genetically designed over the course of centuries to react (or overreact) as a "guard" or attack dog - simply because the animal doesn't yet "know" someone who doesn't feed and shelter it the way you do - you might just want to not invite me (or neighbor children, or elderly people, etc., etc., etc.) over to your house. Not ever.
So whatever you do, don't test me. I know the game. And it is a game. It's yet another stupid little human game about hierarchy, boundaries, petty insecurities and all that other unconscious (usually passive aggressive) crap. The question is: Do you know what's really going on in your own family dynamic?
Really?
'Cause here's the thing: I don't care which member of your immediate or extended family suddenly growls and gets unnecessarily aggressive with me or someone that I may love, merely care about, or even just barely even know. If said individual or individuals (regardless of species) really are a member of your family, and you don't have the simple presence of mind, the decency, or common sense to keep your animals, er... familiars, and assorted associates, properly trained (or even on a leash), that just means that I am equally entitled to get all "defensive" right back at your precious animal. And by extension, I also have the right to protect myself against you.
Because, let's face it, if you're the one hiding behind the animal, if you're the big "care giver," ye olde Master of the House to begin with, then you're the one who is ultimately responsible, aren't you? And we sure don't wanna forget about that part of this particular equation, do we? Surely not.
Either way, here's my final point: Oddly enough, none of my guppies have ever suddenly jumped out of the tank and physically threatened anyone. True story. Hard to believe, perhaps, but certifiably accurate, none the less. So please kindly consider that the next time you hide behind an aggressive animal of your very own (more than likely passive aggressive) choosing.
But that's not what I'm about here. Because in fact, I do understand "pet people." I really do. Why, I myself have often kept fish (guppies) over the years, and no matter how small, fragile and typically short-lived this particular species of ornamental fish may in fact be, I always feel a pang of deep sorrow when even one of them dies. Heck! I even say a little prayer when I have to flush a dead guppy down the toilet.
Even better yet, I also sometimes dig a spoonful out of the soil of a potted plant and really give them a proper burial. Yeah, sentimental, I know, but you should see how well plants grow when fertilized that way. So yeah, I get it. I get "pet people," or rather, people who have an especially strong attachment to their little four legged friends. Or their little partners that may even slither, crawl, or swim. I get it. I really do.
But you really have to admit that structuring one's entire life around a specific breed (or breeds) of domesticated animals quite often (not always, but quite often) involves a whole lot of really counter-intuitive, counter-human behaviors, personal compromises and even sometimes rather bizarre habitat adaptations, that... sorry (not sorry) not everyone who visits your home is going to automatically understand or even be properly adapted to.
Yes, you get used to the smell. Yes, the dog doesn't growl, bark at, or try to bite you, but... it doesn't mean that you are not, in fact, co-habituating with what is still, like it or not, an animal. An animal that simply knows on an instinctive (or highly trained) level what it must and must not do to keep riding the gravy train of your worshipful doting personal care and attention.
So, sure, I get it. But is it your pet, or is it your slave? Hell! Who really is the master and who is the slave in some situations, right? Besides, it's probably just your best friend. 'Cause some animals really are "man's best friend," you know. Some animals even end up being surrogate "babies" for childless (or post-child rearing) couples. Some pets even serve as surrogate spouses! And what's wrong with that, right?
After all, there are many antidotes for loneliness, and pets, quite often, really can, and really do, fill that sweet spot in many a person's otherwise empty life. And I'm definitely for all that. I really am. Such as guide dogs, dogs leading the blind, dogs sniffing out bombs, etc., etc., etc. And hey! Where would good old Charlie Brown be without his Snoopy?
So yeah, I get it. I really, really do. I probably get it more than even a lot of pet owners do. Or rather, I may actually get it even more, honestly, than some folks may think they do. If, that is, they've actually ever even really bothered to think about it all that much to begin with. 'Cause a lot people really don't think all that much about a whole lot of things, you know.
Let's put it this way; if you're one of those people who keeps what, basically, was genetically designed over the course of centuries to react (or overreact) as a "guard" or attack dog - simply because the animal doesn't yet "know" someone who doesn't feed and shelter it the way you do - you might just want to not invite me (or neighbor children, or elderly people, etc., etc., etc.) over to your house. Not ever.
So whatever you do, don't test me. I know the game. And it is a game. It's yet another stupid little human game about hierarchy, boundaries, petty insecurities and all that other unconscious (usually passive aggressive) crap. The question is: Do you know what's really going on in your own family dynamic?
Really?
'Cause here's the thing: I don't care which member of your immediate or extended family suddenly growls and gets unnecessarily aggressive with me or someone that I may love, merely care about, or even just barely even know. If said individual or individuals (regardless of species) really are a member of your family, and you don't have the simple presence of mind, the decency, or common sense to keep your animals, er... familiars, and assorted associates, properly trained (or even on a leash), that just means that I am equally entitled to get all "defensive" right back at your precious animal. And by extension, I also have the right to protect myself against you.
Because, let's face it, if you're the one hiding behind the animal, if you're the big "care giver," ye olde Master of the House to begin with, then you're the one who is ultimately responsible, aren't you? And we sure don't wanna forget about that part of this particular equation, do we? Surely not.
Either way, here's my final point: Oddly enough, none of my guppies have ever suddenly jumped out of the tank and physically threatened anyone. True story. Hard to believe, perhaps, but certifiably accurate, none the less. So please kindly consider that the next time you hide behind an aggressive animal of your very own (more than likely passive aggressive) choosing.
